Stop that snooping now!

I know it seems like a contradiction to say that people shouldn't snoop on each other's Facebook as that is after all the raison d'etre of social networking sites - legitimized 'curtain twitching'. For this reason, I would suggest that everyone carefully vet who they add to, and what information they divulge on their Facebook. My gripe however is with those 'friends' who are proud to say that they never include any information on their Facebook or update it, the ones who are opposed to including pictures of themselves and their families but are quite happy to view my pictures and visit my page every day. That strikes me as a bit of a one-sided relationship where you, my 'friend' get to take and give nothing in return so I've decided to make it my goal to pull the plug on you.
It's like this....either you're interested in Facebook or you're not, if you're not...I would respect you for simply not opening an account. If you do however decide to open an account then you should populate it, granted not everyone has time on their hands or anything worth posting about to update their wall or profile or status everyday or every week for that matter but when the last activity on your wall was you becoming friends with someone 3 months ago then that tells me it's time for you and I to part company...atleast in cyberspace.

I know for a fact that some people take pleasure in observing the lives of others, passing judgement and boasting that they give nothing in return which is why I want you to forget the numbers game, it's about quality not quantity people. I think everyone should periodically delete inactive Facebook friends. It's extremely therapeutic - honestly, you should try it.
I'm sure like me you hate the thought of someone who hasn't dropped you line in a year or more since they asked to be added as your 'friend' ...and yet still have access to your family photos and details of things you find interesting. On a personal note, I consider Facebook a useful tool for keeping in touch with family and friends all over the globe, and in some cases keeping in touch with people I admire or find interesting... it's less about getting in touch with the old schoolmates or random friends of friends who for the most part I will have little or nothing in common with, but more a way of allowing my friends who I once saw regularly but no longer see because either I or they have moved to another country, access to photos of my children, so they get to see them grow and to hear about my new life wherever that may be.
The 'takers' as I've decided to call snoopy passive facebook friends defeat the purpose of social networking sites. My question is if you're too busy or too private to update your status, or add a personal photo or post articles or things of interest, then what on earth are you doing on Facebook? Television is a far better medium for you as it requires a passive audience....shows like 'Gossip Girl' or the Hills work best as their format is like watching a CCTV recording of someone's life. I would advise you stay away from the likes of X factor or Strictly Come Dancing ('Dancing with the stars' in the USA) as they too may require some audience participation.
But for crying out loud, do stop accumulating friends who you have no intention of interacting with.

En Vogue in Concert

As we stood waiting for Maxine, Terri, Dawn and Cindy to come on stage, I was baffled by the presence of a number of men in groups waiting excitedly to watch En Vogue in concert at the Indigo2 in London. I assumed it was going to be a Galfest....a ladies night where we would get to sing along to all the oldies but goodies. Then I had a flashback to the 'Giving him something he can feel' video and it became crystal clear that these men were here to witness their fantasies on stage, albeit 18 years since they last performed in the UK.
True to form, they did not disappoint, the four members of En Vogue appeared on stage to screams and cheers. They looked amazing dressed in black and silver and sang their hearts out from the moment they came out until they gave their final thank you's and left the stage. There were no antics, no costume changes, no special effects... just good ole fashioned entertainment. It was easy to forget that three of them are in their late 40s; their bodies are still incredible and they moved the way they did 20 years ago. They did a medley of motown songs paying tribute to the likes of Tina Turner and Diana Ross and the Supremes and ended with the infamous choreography of 'Giving him Something he can feel', at which point most of the men who had pushed in front of us by this time were now pressed against the barrier near the stage, gawking at the four sexy, sultry women like pubescent boys.

We sang along to hits like 'Hold On' , You're Never Gonna Get it', 'Free your mind' and 'Don't let go'. Dawn Robinson who was also in the group Lucy Pearl treated us to an all female version of 'Dont mess with my man' which had us all gesticulating and doing a diva-esque head roll. It was a blast of a night and reminded us of what real entertainment is - we were there to see these four women, to hear their incredible vocal ranges and witness their energy and their personalities. Each of them have their own individual style and unique singing voice and we were left in awe. If they look this good as they approach their 50s, my guess we haven't seen or heard the last of En Vogue yet. Bring on the new album and hopefully many more exciting concerts.
Very Best of En Vogue

Say you're one of them

 
This is not the Africa I know....Akpan depicts an Africa of victims and oppressors...there is no in-between...children are left to fend for themselves and of course the Western world has lapped this up as it no doubt reinforces their one-dimensional view of Africa.
I have lived and travelled all over Africa - and been to all but one of the countries depicted in this book and what I take away time and again are stories of hope and ambition. Many years ago, I worked in Kenya with someone who lived in the Kibera slums, but to look at this well turned out young man with dreams bigger than mine, you would have no idea of his living conditions or that he was surviving on one basic meal a day and supporting a family of 8. Likewise I have heard many stories of national solidarity in Rwanda during and following the 1994 genocide. People who live in poverty in Africa in my experience have dreams and aspirations as big as anyone else's.

The story that carries the book's title and deals with the Rwandan genocide is over simplistic at best....the round dark faced Hutu versus the light Tutsi with fine features....the evil Hutu genocidaires, the apathetic UN soldiers and ofcourse the vengeful Tutsi RPF soldiers - again we find ourselves in a setting where African children have nowhere to turn, no one to save them.

Say you're one of them' depicts an Africa of victims, one where Africans cannot rescue one another because they are all either evil or poor and helpless. I suppose this presumes that we are a continent waiting to be rescued by the benevolent Western world. While I do not question Akpan's ability to write, I do find it sad that so many reviews have suggested that his stories are in some ways the 'true' Africa and I find it even sadder that Akpan himself sees no hope in his continent or his own people. Had this been a story of one country and one perspective it would be forgiving but to put it forward as in some ways depictive of Africa as a continent and African children's life is a shocking indictment of the continent and in my humble opinion one that is wholly inaccurate.
The following is a review from Amazon.com:
"This book [sic] is really opened my eyes to how children in Africa live and suffer. You always hear about how things are bad there generally, but this author really brings the point home. And that is why I could not finish the book - I felt like it's not really fiction, some variation of the short stories is happening right now to many African children."
How very sad ......as if the BBC and CNN have not done a brilliant enough job of depicting an Africa of wars, corruption, famine and suffering with not much else - here we have an African writer cementing their already skewed views of the continent - is it any wonder we're still dismissed as a basket case?

Say You're One of Them (Oprah's Book Club)